Friday, December 5, 2008

Seven/sept/sette/siete/sieben is the magic number!

What a lovely end to the week, when you wake up to the sound of trumpets rejoicing you and the gleam of new bling landing 'plomp!' on your blog.
OK, so the ringing in my ears was the in fact Cheeky and Monkey's usual opera for milk, but the arrival of new bling is bona fide. The lovely Nappy Valley Girl has graciously awarded me with a Superior Scribbler award. What a fantastic early Christmas present. Thank you very muchly NVG!

Plus, Nappy Valley Girl and my fellow home-improvements 'sister' Hadriana, from Hadriana's Treasures, also tagged me to write some lists of sevens. So, as I've sadly got nothing better to do with my Friday night, here they are.

(To mix it up a bit, as 'tis the season and all, I've given some of my 7s a Christmas theme. Forgive me, but I've got AOL Radio Christmas music on and my Chrissie tree lights are a-twinkling...)

7 things I plan to do before my parents arrive next week for Christmas

1. Buy their Christmas presents. (This includes remembering to collect the mugs the boys have made for them, with their own special brand of toddler artwork.)

2. Wash their bedding, dust and hoover their bedroom.

3. Empty out their closet, which is currently full of cobwebs, old files, papers and various mystery cables and leads Him Downstairs and I have no idea what they are for.

4. Wash the cushion and couch covers in the living room. They once were cream. They are now taupe.

5. Take the garden furniture into the garage. My parents will be appalled to see our summer outside toys, table, sun brolly and chairs covered in snow and rotting in the backyard. Hey - autumn kind of flew by.

6. Learn to cook. More than a roast, spag-bol, lasagna, shepherds pie and cakes. I have to feed them for three blinking weeks and both my parents battle for the title of the 'new' Nigella/Gordon in the kitchen. It's a lot to live up to.

7. Get my roots done, legs waxed and eyebrows reeled in. Currently brows look like two squirrels have left their tales above my eyes. Must revert back to the daughter they once knew and not the sweat pant clad Amy-Winehouse-in-rehab state am currently languishing in.

7 things I do now (instead of preparing for Christmas)

1. Worry constantly about how we will afford college/university fees for the boys, our retirement plus feed two extra mouths during the holidays.

2. Spend time blogging and surfing (internet, not oceans) when I should be playing with my children/learning to cook/do the laundry/clean my house/grocery shop. (I could go on...)

3. Trawl Facebook to see what my friends are up to instead of picking up the phone and calling them.

4. Stay in my dressing gown and PJs unless we have to leave the house. Even I am embarrassed for the post-lady who this week, has rung my doorbell three times after midday to deliver parcels,and found me in the same bespectacled PJ state every time. (Bless her, she thought I was sick!)

5. Constantly fight the urge to eat a cookie, every goddamn half hour. Thanks to BlogToFit, I have put myself on a treadmill of cookie deprivation. This is meant to be a good thing, right?

6. Let my children watch too much TV. So I can blog in peace. (I know. The shame. Major Bad Mummy/Mommy points.)

7. Wonder how I will find time to sneak off to blog while my parents are visiting. (And whether to confess to them that I blog. Yes, probably best not to.)

7 things I can't do this Christmas

1. Watch a gazillion hours of crap TV - My parents will want to, wait for it, TALK TO ME!

2. Have drunken sexy shenanigans with Him Downstairs on Christmas morning.

3. Have a wee with the door open. See how that will go down with the children.

4. Go outside for any sneaky celebratory Christmas ciggies. (That was a highlight of having my sister-in-law to stay last Christmas.)

5. Bring myself to take the giblets out of the turkey. That's what you have Mums for.

6. Spend Christmas just the four of us. On a beach. In the Caribbean.

7. Win Monopoly. Well, maybe there's a first time...

7 Christmas wishes

1. A new kitchen. (If I'm a good girl and the US auto industry doesn't sink, Santa might bring me this before next spring.)

2. Some cashmere lounging socks. My current ones are a disgrace. And not cashmere.

3. Zero arguments with the parents. (I'll keep you posted about if this wish comes true, seeings as I can't help but revert back to a sulky teenager in their presence.)

4. Time away from being Mum/Mom. (Hurray, this one's coming true as HD and I are off to NYC for a romantic three night break away from being parents. Thank you Mum and Dad!)

5. To be a better Mummy. This is also a New Year Resolution. I will play with them more and spend more one-on-one time with each of them next year. Honest.

6. To make HD happier. Bless him. He doesn't complain much. But apparenty I don't put out enough. He has a point.

7. Peace, love, harmony and good fortune for all whom I love. Cheesy but true.

7 things I say most often as Christmas approaches

1. Remember, Santa's watching.

2. Stop it! Do you really want me to have to phone Santa?

3. No, no more toy catalogues have arrived in the mail today.

4. Yes, Mummy and Daddy will put the fire out so Santa doesn't burn his bottom when he comes down the chimney.

5. I don't think Santa will fit quite that many toys just for you in his sack darling.

6. No, the reindeer don't live at our house.

7. Thank god: they're asleep.

7 celebrities I'd invite for Christmas dinner

1. Ruth Jones - but for added entertainment, she'd have to come as her Gavin & Stacey character, Vanessa-Shanessa wouldn't she?

2. Louis Theroux -like Nappy Valley Girl, I think he's witty and rather gorgeous.

3. Matthew Macfadyen- great British sex-on-legs actor.

4. Sarah Jessica Parker - great American actress with great shoes.

5. Maureen Lipman- good British actress, very funny and she'll always be Beattie from the British Telecom ads to me. I love the fact that she won an award for "You got an Ology ... "

6. Gary Lightbody - singer and front man with Snow Patrol. He could serenade me as I baste the turkey.

7. Victoria Beckham - just to see if she'd actually eat anything except dust.

7 favourite festive foods
(Though of course, because of my participation in BlogToFit, I'll only be indulging in these modestly this year...)

1. Roast turkey and all the trimmings
2. Cadbury's selection boxes. Hope Santa brings me one. Hint. Hint
3. Terry's Plain Chocolate Orange
4. The Boxing Day ham, mustard mash and green beans we always have
5. Chocolate Yule log
6. Leftover turkey and salad cream sandwiches (Can't get enough of these)
7. Sausage rolls (I've already scheduled my Mum in to bake her usual freezer-filling batch)

7 other bloggers who can do this too if they so wish but please don't feel obliged (I've chosen from my fellow pound-busters at BlogToFit)

1. Turf Dad
2. Deconstructing Jen
3. ThatGirl39
4. NotSuperMum
5. Dave Fowler
6. Tara Cain
7. Dave Wright

And then, not forgetting that Christmas is a time for giving, I'd like to bestow the Superior Scribbler award to the luscious Confused Take That Fan, who has me laughing and crying regularly at her blog and my favourite Auntie, the rock n roll machine that is, Auntie Gwen. I'd love an Xmas mosh with you both!


  1. Aawh, thank you sweetie xx I'm very touched and it will forthwith be placed in my little cyberdrawer of nice things and ONE DAY I will manage to put it on my sidebar !!Techfeckinology not being my strong point and all...
    yes, I know that my himself is an IT God but he's Far Too Busy And Important to help me.

    Make sure you go see Glasvegas when they get to Detroit and don't worry that you can't understand the lead singer's accent when he speaks to the crowd, I lived in Glasgow for 21 years and I struggle to understand him !!!

  2. Aah lovely Mum/Mom. I must have been doing the hand out of the award the same time as you, as I had you down to win an award, then came over and noticed that of course being such a super scribbler you have won one already. The reason I was going to give you one (ahem, an award of course), is because you are funny, make me laugh and cry, I adore you, miss you and you gave me the funniest and prettiest birthday pressie that just shows how well you know me. Some oven mitts. Loved 'em to bits! Because we are both trying to kid ourselves we will one day be domestic goddesses but are both a pair of lazy arses who miss drinking copious amounts of vodka and smoking marlborough lights whilst putting the world to rights. And our men to rights too. Our intentions are always good, but there is always something more pressing to do than trying out a new Morrocan Lamb dish or making an Eaton Mess.
    Love you lady. Miss you. xxx
    PS Christmas tree is up. Now I just need to accessorise the rest of the home (cue spending ridiculous amounts of money I don't have on twee stuff...)

  3. Ooh, thanks for the tag! I loved your lists of seven things....I'll have to have a good ponder about mine, see what I can come up with!

    I'm a late-comer to your blog, but I LOVE IT!

  4. Your list sounds so much like mine ... wash the bed linens before inlaws come, do your roots, clean the room, forgot to add try not to go insane!

  5. Glad I tagged you, that was great and I can identify with a lot of it (especially Facebook, Carribean beach and Gary Lightbody to serenade me!)

    We don't have parents coming for Xmas but I can imagine the pressure....

  6. Aww shucks thanks. Oh shit, just realised what I've got to do.
    Thanks a lot . . .

  7. Thanks for the tag - it kept me busy this afternoon whilst I wallowed in my germs! And as per Tara - got me my blog mojo back! x

  8. Mom/mum where for art thou? I know it's Christmas and New Years but please comeback soon! x